For $38,900, You Could Own the Worst Version of the Worst Generation of Suburban

"Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies" (jordanwphillips)
12/29/2017 at 17:30 • Filed to: None

Or 4 correct generation Suburban 2500 8.1's in good condition.

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DISCUSSION (38)

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:36

That may very well be the crackiest pipe I have ever seen.

HammerheadFistpunch > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:37

ITs not a bad generation, but it IS the worst of its generation. And those wheels. Man alive at least source some stock wheels for this.

My citroen won't start > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:37

Look at how classic and original this is!

We put massive chrome rims on it.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > HammerheadFistpunch
12/29/2017 at 17:37

Those are at least factory+.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:38

But barn doors tho

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > My citroen won't start
12/29/2017 at 17:38

Not chrome, simply alloy. And they are only like 17's.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > My citroen won't start
12/29/2017 at 17:39

...those are factory wheels

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles
12/29/2017 at 17:40

Hatch>Barn Doors. More hinges to rust up, more doors to sag, and a lot less visibility.

My citroen won't start > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
12/29/2017 at 17:41

Factory from 2013. At least put some period correct wheels on them.

My citroen won't start > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:43

American Alloy, which must always be shiny for some reason. But they don’t look right, that thing needs OEM period correct wheels and tires.

HammerheadFistpunch > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:43

wait...really?

winterlegacy, here 'till the end > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:45

But... barn doors...

My citroen won't start > HammerheadFistpunch
12/29/2017 at 17:46

Factory but not period correct. There is a big difference there.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > HammerheadFistpunch
12/29/2017 at 17:50

Yeah, as citroen said, it’s not period correct, but it’s a super common mod. It’s the wheels from a GMT900 Z71.

Urambo Tauro > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 17:51

Holy time capsule Batman! Fine specimen.

HammerheadFistpunch > My citroen won't start
12/29/2017 at 17:54

Ah, I see it now, I had to find a close one. They looked like cheap aftermarket wheels.

Patrick Nichols > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 18:14

I like the split tailgate from my old burban better than the hatch, though I do understand the practical argument for the full hatch...

Saab wagon is best wagon-now with less Saab > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 18:15

That’s definitely a massive CP, but as someone who’s got a family member that owns one with over 200k miles and a surprisingly low amount of rust for spending 20 years in upstate NY, and someone who’s taken said Suburban on a drive, I’m gonna have to disagree with the “worst generation” bit.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Saab wagon is best wagon-now with less Saab
12/29/2017 at 18:17

That’s pure luck on the rust part. But it’s easily the worst. The engines are archaic, the trans is 50/50 roulette, the interior is crap, it drives like crap, even for a truck. I could go on, but the prior generation looks better, and the generation after IS much better.

average user > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 18:18

I have a soft spot for the two door versions from this generation (yukon/tahoe?)

My citroen won't start > HammerheadFistpunch
12/29/2017 at 18:20

They look very cheap.

HammerheadFistpunch > My citroen won't start
12/29/2017 at 18:23

anything bigger than 16 inches on 20 year old trucks always does

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > average user
12/29/2017 at 18:28

I did until I drove one, it was awful. (Inb4 the usual “trucks don’t drive well, what were you expecting”, I drive trucks daily, and that generation is just bad).

John Norris (AngryDrifter) > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 18:29

Mileage: 30,978

That’s impressive if true. That’s an average of 1300 miles per year.

My citroen won't start > HammerheadFistpunch
12/29/2017 at 18:45

Thank you.

shop-teacher > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 19:12

I rarely agree with you, but this is truth.

Except for the Squarebody trucks. Barn doors are better in those, because to open the tailgate you have to put down the giant rear window.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > shop-teacher
12/29/2017 at 19:15

Which is a horrid design, because my 4Runner has that, and it’s broken.

diplodicus forgot his password > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 20:46

5th gen broncos are the same way.

LOREM IPSUM > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 20:53

Drop a zero and we’ll talk.

shop-teacher > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/29/2017 at 22:16

Exactly

shop-teacher > diplodicus forgot his password
12/29/2017 at 22:17

Yep, and most of them are broken too.

horizonsofkhaos > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/30/2017 at 00:56

The leak potential I’ve found is significantly worse with barn doors. My mom purchased a 99 Yukon that she thought was okay but it’s the worst vehicle I’ve ever driven. Build quality is just awful. Drove horrible. Interior leaks everywhere. Multiple things that went wrong and would drain the battery overnight. That thing is just a turd. So ready to just get it out of the yard and never see it again. I wish someone was dumb enough to buy it but it’s so bad I don’t think anyone would buy it for anything but scrap.

diplodicus forgot his password > shop-teacher
12/30/2017 at 10:25

Surprisingly that never broke on my dad’s, used it Everytime he took me to hockey too. I want one so bad but they’re practically all rust these days.

My uncle picked up a rust free 4th gen and everywhere he goes guys ask how much he wants.

shop-teacher > diplodicus forgot his password
12/30/2017 at 11:30

I will have a Squarebody someday, but yeah, finding one that isn’t a rust bucket is getting harder and harder.

boxrocket > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
12/30/2017 at 12:46

Definitely among the worst, though personally the best-looking of the Chevy full-size SUVs yet made.

boxrocket > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles
12/30/2017 at 12:49

Excursion had the best rear door setup: Lift-up glass, and barn-door lower section. Why this hasn’t become the standard i have no idea.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > boxrocket
12/30/2017 at 12:49

The previous gen looks better, and I think the gen after it has aged better.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > boxrocket
12/30/2017 at 15:06

Because it didn’t work very well. Too many latches and handles, and things to align. It was a cool idea tho. My FIL has a diesel 02 Excursion, and it is a handy system, but easy to break.